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BO JAMES HWANG
Student, UCLA
Bo James Hwang is a post-baccalaureate pre-medical student at UCLA Extension. He aspires to pursue a career in medicine and public health research. He is currently the Student/Young Professional Director II for Asian Pacific Islander Caucus for Public Health, research community advisor for the TGNC Health Research Advisory Network, and the Vice President of Southern California Lambda Medical Association.
First can we ask about where you grew up?
I was born in Uijeongbu, Korea but immigrated with my father and sister at the age of 4 to East Hollywood. When I was 15, my family moved to Koreatown after we got into low income housing. Are there a lot of Koreans in East Hollywood? No, it was predominantly Latinx folks. It was pretty hard growing up there because kids know stereotypes and I used to get picked on a lot. Getting called Bruce Lee, the whole slanted eye thing, ching chong...I don’t know how they learned this stuff. TV, probably. Yeah. Not seeing yourself in other people was especially hard. Did you not have any Asian role models? Not really. At church, maybe? But even then I didn’t really because church is kind of its own world. I’m Christian, but it’s hard because there’s church, and then there are your other friends. So what about now? Do you feel like you’ve found that community or role model? Definitely. But I can’t find anyone exactly like me. There are parts of people that I really like, though. Whereas before I used to be really closed minded and tried to find my exact role model, now I can see the good in everything. I think that’s why I have role models now. What was the change like moving from East Hollywood, which doesn’t have a lot of East Asians, to Koreatown? That was...different. But it was kind of bad, too, because my family is super poor, and the Korean people around us were also poor. Because people were poor and needed to get money, they would deceive other Koreans, which was hard to watch. We know that pride is a really big concept in Korean culture, so we tend to brush over a lot of hidden parts of Koreatown like homelessness, drug and alcohol abuse, prostitution, brothels. Were these parts very visible to you, living in Koreatown? Definitely. My dad’s a cab driver, so he keeps me up-to-date on all the illegal things going on. It’s definitely prevalent, which is why the need for services like KYCC’s mental health services are very important. I live with my dad, my grandma, and my sister, so we have three generations in our household. My 85-year-old grandma keeps talking about how she’s going to die soon, and my dad eggs her on. So I was like, “Dad, Grandma is going to get depressed if you keep telling her that.” He said, “We don’t have things like that.” I don’t think they believe in things like depression. That’s why sometimes older generations make fun of us because we talk about our feelings a lot, but for them to survive, they had to not talk about their feelings and brush it off. Our generation knows mental health is real and that it impacts us. Even though there were those bad parts of living in Koreatown, did living there somehow strengthen your roots to your Korean culture in any way? I think so. After I moved to Koreatown, I received mental health services at KYCC, and it was nice to have a Korean American therapist because a lot of therapists are white. And they don’t really understand because Eastern culture is about doing things and sacrificing for your family, but Western culture is about independence and freedom. Like “Whatever you want to do and whatever makes you happy, if that’s your passion, if that’s your dream, then you go for it!” But for the Korean immigrant family, that’s not really the case. You’ve encountered all these obstacles, and there’s obviously so much that could be improved. What’s your main priority or cause that you’re passionate about? Definitely intersectionality. I’m passionate about having more representation of Korean American people who are not stereotypical. A lot of people see me, and they don’t think I’m Korean American because I don’t act or look like it. But I definitely think that it’s more representation than BTS and stuff. Because those celebrities are part of our culture, but I don’t think it really defines us. And I think I realized it when I went to NCLC, too, because everyone was super different. I think our generation will definitely be very different from the first generation. But I do worry sometimes too, like shoot, what if we lose our culture? |
"That’s why sometimes older generations make fun of us, because we talk about our feelings a lot, but for them to survive, they had to not talk about their feelings and brush it off. Our generation knows mental health is real and that it impacts us."
We know that the Korean American culture has a very linear view of success. Like doctor, lawyer, engineer. So I wanted to ask what is your personal view of success?
This sounds kind of cliche, but I guess I want to be happy? I am pre-med too, but I understand why a lot of Korean Americans do see success as those professions. Back in the day people experienced a lot of racism, but you can’t really discriminate against someone with an MD. Success for me is also living my truth and redefining what it means for me, like what a family means, because sometimes I think about wanting to be a foster parent too. I know there are a lot of Korean American kids in the foster system, and it’s hard for them to get foster parents. But I’m not sure. Kids are so cute, but they’re also really annoying. What kind of doctor do you want to be? I’m smart, but I know I’m not that smart. Like I have to study a lot to get A’s in my science classes, so I don’t think being a surgeon is for me. Maybe primary or pediatric care, or I’d love to be a doctor for trans and queer youth, but I’m also scared because I don’t want to get death threats. I actually also thought about becoming a therapist because if I applied to social work school, I could apply now versus taking a bunch of other science classes, and I was thinking, dang, I’d be a bomb therapist. Are you close to your sister? Do y’all remember SaveOn drugs? It’s now CVS, do y’all know CVS? Well when I was 13, I was really high and I stole chocolate from CVS because that’s what I used to do -- I sold chocolate so I could make money to buy drugs. I grew up with a single father and we’re super poor, so I didn’t get things like allowance.If I wanted to eat something, I had to fend for myself. So I stole chocolate and when all the workers were walking around, I immediately started apologizing. They called my family, and when my sister came she was just bawling. I think when I saw my sister crying, I felt that someone cared for me because I was molested as a child, and I didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t even know it was wrong. And that’s when I started acting out, like people would say I talked too much, or teachers told me I wasn’t smart enough or as good as my sister. I couldn’t focus, and I probably had PTSD from being sexually assaulted as a child. That really impacts you, but when I saw my sister cry I was like wow...somebody cares about me. What’s the hardest lesson you learned? If you take the shortcut in life, you’re going to take the long way back. My high was really sketchy -- we got shot at going to class. I had to get out. But I still needed to graduate, so I cheated. And then I graduated early and went to community college when I was 16, but ended up in remedial math and failed pre-algebra three times because I had no foundation. So if I could go back, if I’d done it the proper way, I’d be a medical school student by now. On a lighter note, what’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? My story was featured at UCLA and I won a scholarship, and this lady -- I think she was a professor or something -- she came up to me and was all like, “wow...I saw your picture in the magazine but you’re more attractive in person.” I don’t know if that was a compliment. I was so shocked, I was like “oh...thank you.” But she’s probably just telling me I’m fat and ugly in pictures. I’m not like Moon, I’m not skinny. So where do you see yourself 10 years from now? I want to be giving back. Like before I wanted to drive a Tesla and have AirPods, but now I don’t need a nice car. I want to give back and give money to programs like NCLC or other organizations and I would definitely want to be a doctor or therapist or researcher. I just want to be a better person and be able to love other people unconditionally. |